I have an entire cubicle?!

It’s been so long since I’ve used a desktop. Where’s the exposé button?

Do I need reading glasses?

This is the best chair in the world!

Why is this a big kid job? Because I don’t have to ask to use the restroom.

The interns look happy here. I don’t understand.

Was the Harry Potter joke too soon? If not, when do the practical jokes start? I’m ready to put some staplers in jello.

This is the worst chair in the world!

Health insurance. Wow!

Let’s be clear. Had I known the company was paying for lunch, water wouldn’t have been my beverage of choice.

*Finds chair lever.* WRONG LEVER! Ah, remember (being unemployed) when I could just watch Emperor’s New Groove anytime I wanted?

I wonder if my brain will turn to mush in the corporate world.

Everyone’s so nice. I like nice people. They’re nice.

I might leave my voicemail as is. Who needs to know that I’m not “Joseph Kim.” (I changed the name, but you get the idea.)

This is an okay chair in the world!